Random fact: Sugar Gliders are cute
Monday, March 29, 2010 ( 11:44 pm )

Mummy, can I please have one?

Just Quote Me
Sunday, March 28, 2010 ( 12:09 pm )

"If you can't be original, be spicy. If you can't be spicy at all, then just remain a chicken."

Allow me to explain:
A KFC chicken is either original or spicy. You pick your pick. If you pick spicy, you add a little something to the original recipe, but it will not taste like the original AT ALL. That's spicy. In other words, you can have role models, and follow the goodness of that role model. Or you can have inspirations and let that inspiration inspire you as much as you want it to. Above all that, you still have to be YOU. But if you can't be the real deal, and if all you do is fake around, lie and pretend you're the best, when actually you're just copying someone else, why don't you just be a chicken because that's what you are. Why not? You're just afraid to be yourself aren't you?

NOTE: This Just Quote is dedicated to the non-original, good-for-nothing, I-think-I'm-all-that-but-I'm-not copycats. I would just like to let everyone know, that I'm actually quite passionate about my writing. I'm absolutely annoyed by those who take my work and make it theirs. Nice to know if I'm an inspiration. But I wasn't born yesterday. It's not my fault you feel so insecure. So don't be such a (insert vulgar word here).

Earth Hour 2010: DONE. :)
Saturday, March 27, 2010 ( 10:35 pm )

Mini update on Earth Hour :
8.25 p.m, Already sitting at the balcony, waiting to watch the city turn of its lights. I've got quite a view of Kuala Lumpur from the balcony. It looks really pretty at night, with the cars and the street lights. Ooh, I can even see KLCC from my place. And KL Tower. And Dato' Yusof Haslam's house too. Erm, yeah. Whatever.

8.30 p.m, lights off. It was nice to watch KLCC, KL Tower and the buildings surrounding it turn off theie lights. It happened in a blink of the eye and it suddenly blended in with the night sky, as though the buildings weren't even there, . Beautiful I must say. Very. But Yusof Haslam's place was all bright(as usual). My oh my. :0

8.54 p.m, a text from Mysara. "Happy earth hour people!:D". Thanks, babe.

9.30 p.m, lights back on. While looking at that blank sky, I suddenly saw buildings glowing bit by bit. I'll say this again: beautiful. Very.

Later on I continued watching Keeping Up With the Kardashians on E! And what am I doing watching a show like that? I just like a bit of drama. :D

Til then, keep smiling! :)

Friday, March 26, 2010 ( 5:19 pm )

Salam 1 Malaysia.
(sorry. Just wanted to try that. LOL)

I just got off the phone with my friend. I made a video call to Wan and Pah because the rest of them were all there. Feels nice to get a glimpse of their happy faces eating at Friday's. I'd bet a million bucks that Ainaa would update her blog with pictures of just now. :P But it's not nice to gamble. Correct me if I'm wrong, Azharul Amir? *smiles sarcastically* :)

Thinking about friends makes me think about the memories I've had with them. In fact, most of my memories are made up of friends, friends and friends. Thinking about the memories makes me think back. Well I must say the more appropriate word here is flashback.

The spontaneous recurrence of visual hallucinations I've had sometimes confuses me with Deja Vu. Wait. Don't get clueless yet:
I had a flashback at a mamak stall when I was about to pour the curry onto my rice. Suddenly there were visual hallucinations being played inside my head as if my head were too an intersect like the one in Chuck(no not Chuck Bass. Chuck Bartowski)'s head. I saw a plate of rice falling into the big pot of curry. I wondered what that was. Normally, I'd imagine the worst things that could happen. So I assumed that it was just another 'being me' thing. I kept silent about it til someone brought up that I did that three years ago. Same stall. And all I could think of was, "Oh, no wonder the whole picture was inside my head. Whatever."

And then there were those days when I was still traumatized about the robbery in my own home. Every time I opened my bedroom door, I kept seeing those good-for-nothing men covering their mouth with shirts. One of them was holding a knife in one hand. I screamed the lungs out of me right when I saw those stupid and dumb strangers pointing that sharp thing at me.

About a week before that day, a Wednesday night to be more exact, I had a lonely dinner. I could care less about my phone sitting alone on my study table. Until I got a text from my best friend, Cean. A somewhat text that made me freak and get all excited. Forgive me. I need to laugh. Hahahaha. I called her straight away to talk about it. So it was about a boy(yes, I'm a girl and girls sometimes get excited over boys), and bla bla bla bla the story goes on. Then I called Shazana and Elina and they were all excited too because they knew I needed some light to be shown on me again. I think. You know, girls. Later on that night, I received a goodnight text from him. My Red fm late night love songs routine suddenly fitted the situation perfectly. Went to school the next morning and told everyone about him. I don't know why I find his goofy-ness charming. I mean, have you ever heard him laugh? LMAO. Well I'll go ahead and tell you this: Who would of thought that I'd end up with him. :)

I personally think flashback is a good exercise for the mind and memory. Why don't you try it sometime?

Til then. Keep smiling :)

I'll miss you, Mak Cak. ♥
Thursday, March 25, 2010 ( 7:37 pm )

Salam takziah to The Ismails on the loss of my dearest Mak Cak. Dearest Pak Cak and cousins, love you guys to bits. Will be missing Mak Cak's yummy, delicious, nutritious cooking which has Abali as its number 1 fan. I had troubles on making the perfect caramel pudding, and she gave me tips which worked wonderfully. I'll miss the joy she spreads around us.
Enough said.


( 12:29 am )

Ladies and gentlemen. Boys and girls.
Oh my. Is this true?
Why yes.
It is.
It's not a camera.
It's not an SLR.
It's a Pen.
Or so that's how I think the tag line goes. Whatever. THE JUICE: Olympus has released a member to the Pen series. And it is.... (drum roll please), Pen E-PL1.
Now, I'm not really sure which is better; Pen E-PL1 OR Pen E-P1? Both look pretty dashing and vintage to me(which is one of the reasons why my eyes got glued to the telly when I saw its commercial *yikesss*. Oh, while I was watching Glee on Starworld *a-must-mention*). I'm not really into SLRs because it seems like everyone has it now. My problem is I don't really like having something someone else has too(bad habit. Double yikes). Well now that I've caught my eyes on it. I think I want one. Although, I feel that my heart was made for the other Pen.
Oh so help me God :D

I'm a Gleek.
Wednesday, March 24, 2010 ( 6:28 pm )

It's official. I'm a Gleek.
This Golden Globe's best tv series has soaked my ears into Idina Menzel's Defying Gravity.
Mucho love it.

Something has changed within me
Something is not the same
I'm through with playing by the rules
Of someone else's game
Too late for second-guessing
Too late to go back to sleep
It's time to trust my instincts
Close my eyes: and leap!

It's time to try
Defying gravity
I think I'll try
Defying gravity
Kiss me goodbye
I am defying gravity
And you wont bring me down!

I'm through accepting limits
''cause someone says they're so
Some things I cannot change
But till I try, I'll never know!
Too long I've been afraid of
Losing love I guess I've lost
Well, if that's love
It comes at much too high a cost!

I'd sooner buy
Defying gravity
Kiss me goodbye
I'm defying gravity
I think I'll try
Defying gravity
And you wont bring me down!

I'd sooner buy
Defying gravity
Kiss me goodbye
I'm defying gravity
I think I'll try
Defying gravity
And you won't bring me down!
bring me down!
ohh ohhh ohhhh!

Just Quote Me
Sunday, March 21, 2010 ( 3:45 pm )

instead of counting sheep
( 12:46 am )

If I had to live alone, I'd survive with a juice box and a chocolate bar.
If I had to choose a better Edward Cullen than our current man the Robster, I'd choose Ed Westwick(Y).
If I had to cry watching something on the telly, I'd watch Fly Me To The Moon.
If I had to get a job, I'd get a job as a storyteller at the local library.
If I had to pack only one bag to go far far away, I'd pack my beloved family(and of course a few undergarments).
If I had to pick a pillow to hug to sleep, I'd pick Mun ♥.
I'm sleepy.
But my eyes are wide open.
I couldn't sleep.
But now I can.
I'm off to bed.
Goodnight, world.

I just know.
Saturday, March 20, 2010 ( 3:33 pm )

I've went on stage before. And I had no idea what I was doing. Pretending that I could speak in public. What on earth was I thinking?? I had the nerves. But the second "e" in nerves changed to "ou" and became nervous. I BECAME nervous. I stopped halfway. But got an applause for my guts.

I'm growing up and I've been struggling with confidence. But here's the juice. I'm better on paper. I can write anything I feel. The words just flow out of my fingertips like a waterfall. Ongoing like a never ending fun ride.

Maybe, just MAYBE, I don't have it in me to say it right yet. But, I'll just take the advantage to once again do my thing here(thank you for being mine, justadmitme.blogspot.com ♥).

There's this girl I know.
I've known for quite sometime. She turned her back on me once. And so did I. We were immature and young and have made the ugliest, most hideous, most stupid and out-of-this-world-and-I-mean-for-real mistakes. Thankful for having that moment, we grew up to become wonderful people. Not to say that we are perfect(note: I do not believe in perfection), but we just can't defy growth. I was once weak. And I've turned to her. It's nice to have someone strong to talk to. She's a good friend of mine. And I know her still. She's so strong, she made me stronger!
Psst. I secretly know, that she is still strong. It's just abit hard for her to see that with all the tears in her eyes. It gives a blurry image. All girls must agree with that statement.
I hope she knows that.
I hope you know that, D.

trust: the key to everything
Friday, March 19, 2010 ( 12:49 pm )

At times when you feel down, you wish you were someone else.
And at times when someone else feels down, they wish they were you.
At times you feel like no one else understands you.
And at times, it's true. No one else understands you.
Difficult situations. Dealt only by the wise.
Difficult situations. We face all the time. What do we do if we aren't wise?
We deal with the difficult situation. We become wise.
A pessimist would say, "I am unlucky to face these difficulties,". Whereas, an optimist would say. "I am lucky to face these difficulties,".

TRUE OR FALSE: Girls mature faster than boys.
True. And still lovin' it.

TRUE OR FALSE: I mature a bit faster than normal.
Fortunately or unfortunately, it is true. And I have doubts about lovin' it too.

If the process of growing up could just slow down a little bit more, I would be 12 years old. I still look 12. Or so that's what my friends say. An 8-year-old even tried to hit on me once. I wonder how old I was to him. But that's not the topic now is it?

Here's what I wish to point out:
Yes, I am the youngest monkey out of four. Yes, the youngest is always a bit more special than the rest. Handled with extra care and pamper. But no, I'm not the youngest one who gets anything she wants. I'm not the youngest one who her parents have to do everything for her. I'm not the youngest one who can't do anything at all. I thank Ibu for giving me trust. It all started when I was 13, I was eager to go to school by myself. From that trust, I gained independence. Of course, I am only 17. Most of the decisions are 50 percent of my parents' thoughts and guidance. But as I grow up, and since I grow up a little bit faster than average (physical aspects excluded. I think the anti-aging look runs in the blood. Or so that's what my sister says.), I need to start making some of the decisions in life on my own. I need more trust from my parents. No, wait. Not just that. I need them to believe in what I can do, rather than thinking about the things I can't. I can't handle doubt. That's an ego problem, I suppose. I remember a friend telling me that women have more ego than men. I believe that now.

I do take it a little bit more seriously when people doubt me. It hurts. And inside, I'm still the youngest. Some words can make myself feel so small until I feel like a little girl again. And I cry. But I get up. I forgive. But I don't forget. See, that's the best part of the brain. It keeps awful memories for life. Only to make us humans a better person. A better human. A useful one to the planet.
And so that I shall be.

Good not great. So what?
Tuesday, March 16, 2010 ( 5:06 pm )

Hi. I'm Sya.
I'm also sensitive.
SO PLEASE, respect that.
Lack of respect in the people whom shall I say "disagree with the good, great qualities and events in my life" is entirely a FACT which disappoints me dearly.
Somehow, I am different. I'm not like you. I am blessed with many different ways of thinking. I experience the worst things and I've survived. Don't believe me?
I've survived living in a home without any parental supervision(sounds fun ey? I was too young and innocent to take opportunities like that to throw parties. LOL).

I've survived living in a home without windows and doors.

I've survived sitting all alone in front of the class, with just a single table while everyone else had a desk mate. That lasted a year.

I've survived a robbery. In my own home. The very same day, I went to school. I had an English talk, and I survived that too(washed my face several times during the talk).

I've survived heartbreaks.

I'm surviving not achieving my target, disappointment in a way. And I'm also surviving living in a home without a fridge.

All is well. I can, will and must survive.
You can too.

I've cried my eyeballs out. I kept on rejecting Bapak's calls. I ignored the comfort given by my dearest friends, my beloved Ibu. I ignored my boyfriend for a day, causing him to be all lonely and bored and missing me a lot(I'm sorry and I love you). I almost fell for the trap of "The more the A's the better the feel!", which I believed was long plotted by our dearest Ministry of Education. Nevertheless, it's their job. And it is my job to pull myself together.

I once said to myself, if I achieved my target, all the sorrow, the sadness, that every single bad feeling I've experienced, would be washed away. And that would be the beginning of something good in life again.

But I was a fool, depending on a piece of paper to bring back my happiness. I was a fool, to allow a piece of paper to flush me into tears and make me become so ignorant of how amazing I am without that piece of paper. It took a call from a dear brother, hats off, to tell me how proud he was of me, to make me realize that I did good.

I feel good about myself, when I know, I have the greatest things in life already. It is true, Allah did not give me what I wanted, but He gave me what I needed. The best. I know that I'm not alone. Great people surround me always. Never leaving me. Always having my back, being by my side, letting me walk in front.

Fail trying. Succeed failing.
I need not pleasure, but happiness. And I need not fame, but respect. I am so proud of the people around me, and I am so lucky to sail this hardship. Leastwise, you now know how to survive.

Keep smiling :)

what I hate you hate to hate too
Saturday, March 13, 2010 ( 6:13 pm )

I hate the fact that

stress can show on your face.
women need beauty sleep and men don't.
eye bags stick around even after sleepless nights are over.


Those were the days
Friday, March 12, 2010 ( 6:01 pm )

There were times when I

ate a lot
smiled a lot
laughed a lot.

And all of that gave me a good, fresh and happy look.
Not just on the outside, but on the inside too.

Now, I

eat a little bit less
forget how to smile in photos
laugh every now and then.

I need to get my groove back. And I can't think of ways. Help?

I don't like this
Monday, March 08, 2010 ( 6:18 pm )

I noticed that I somehow don't serve the qualities of a perfect human being. And why is that so?

1. I watch a certain person in my life(pretty important. A member of somewhat important organization in my life) litter around town and spend a lot when only have little. And I do nothing about it.

2. Every now and then, I feel lazy. When there are things to do, I don't do it. And where is nothing to do at all, I whine.

3. I'm easily pissed off. When in this state, I become ignorant of others' feelings; sorry, sad, guilty etc. I am kinda cold when I want to be cold. And as a girl, jealousy of course is in a girl's nature. But, i think I'm slightly greater than normal. Yikes

There's a lot more to it. But I wouldn't want to waste time squeezing out the memory juice of my brain. It's got other things to worry about. I do realize that there are things that are beyond my control. And I do realize nothing was, is, or ever will be perfect. Perfection has always been a popular issue in my blog. And every time I feel insecure, or not good about myself, I bring it up. I never chose to be this way; weird, different, beyond average. But that's who I am. I can live with this fact. And when there is something good in my life, something quite normal, little things tend to ruin it.

GOOD THINGS; it's not always there. But when it's there for me, I plead, don't touch it. I assure you that there are greater things that awaits each and everyone of you. YOUR OWN GREAT THINGS.

Some may not understand. But that's not what is important. What is important? Respect.
Some might not realize the things they've touched that don't belong to them are a once in a lifetime chance. Or, was.

I'll squeeze more juice out of my brain when I have the time for it.
Til then.

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